Paternal Midlife Crisis
Every time you made someone wait will come back to you when you’re in their shoes. It’s easy to blame a woman’s propensity to admire her own reflection excessively when it suits you, just as it’s easier to blame the world for your inherent laziness.
I’ve sat in enough waiting rooms to understand that you can’t really count on people’s punctuality. That’s why punctuality is such a valuable quality, found mostly in experienced butlers or limousine drivers whose only task is to be there five minutes early and arrive at your destination five minutes ahead of schedule.
When the bedroom door opened and I saw her come down the stairs, the scent of the imported perfume I’d given her flooded my nose. Sandra stopped and with a reluctant face looked into my eyes seeking comfort and reassurance. She looked stunning in her red dress that accentuated her feminine form. That was no longer my small and fragile Sandra who used to call me after school because everyone was on their smartphones texting trying to fill the void of their lives.
What do you think, daddy? – She said smiling and posing. I complimented her in a simple way. Nothing that an empty adjective couldn’t describe. I wanted to say she had grown up to become a beautiful woman, and that suddenly my daughter’s worth, to the whole world, had peaked, in her twenties with her eyes sparkling. I did little to satisfy the perfectionist in her – full of modern sensibilities.
She looked at herself and went back upstairs to fix her hair a bit more. I took a sip of Jack Daniels and reassured her once more.
Sandra, the taxi is already here! Is it going to take another decade for you to find more confidence? You look beautiful and I don’t want to have to call another cab. She ran past me, but had time to kiss me on the cheek and say “I love you, dad.” I watched her get into the taxi while thinking that I’m already getting too old, soon I’d have grandchildren, but before that it would be worse when I’d meet her boyfriend.
You know, when you’re a father and you can’t admit to yourself what the whole world has already noticed? Yeah, my daughter grew up and I’m having a paternal midlife crisis.
